The Truth About Abstinence Only Education

The verdict is out. Research studies finally confirm that abstinence-only sex education programs are a complete waste of time and money. Hopefully, this is going to be a wake-up call to the out-of-touch with reality politicians, parents, school board members and naive mental health professionals. The real issue that needs to be addressed is how best to teach our children about sex, particularly since sex is everywhere- in our music, on television, in movies and in virtually every arena of our lives. And teaching human sexuality, including unwanted pregnancy and sexually transmitted diseases, without helping our children to explore how and what sex means to them in the context of their relationships does a grave disservice to our youth. It is only through this kind of exploration and dialogue that they will decide what value (if any) sex will play in their teenage lives. Is sex to be viewed as an activity like playing tennis or golf? Or is sex something that naturally occurs within the context of a loving relationship?

The statistics sum it up. Teens are having more sex and are contracting more diseases than ever before. According to a “U.S. News and World Report” feature story, “kids from all walks of life are having sex at younger and younger ages. Nearly one in ten, reports losing his or her virginity before the age of thirteen. Some 16% of high school sophomores have had 4 or more sexual partners and 1 in 4 sexually active teens will contract a sexually transmitted disease.”

The Bush administration has committed itself to spending $135 million next year alone in community- based sex-education programs that are designed to teach kids how not to have sex until they’re married. Although this may appear to be a lofty goal, programs designed to teach “abstinence only” or for that matter “safe sex,” simply do not work. These programs need a “context”. And that context is teaching our youth about healthy relationships.

We need to teach our children about what ingredients go into a loving and healthy relationship. It is only then that they will be in a position to be able to assess who’s right (or wrong) for them BEFORE deciding whether or not to have sex, or to commit to a long-term relationship like marriage. This is the kind of education and information that our youth needs in order to make wise relationship decisions. And since the majority of parents are either too uncomfortable, uninformed, or too busy to talk to their children about relationships and sex and since the schools are more concerned about preparing our children for their SAT’s and FCATS, children are basically left to their own devices to deal with subject matter far more complicated (and with far grater consequences) than getting an “A” in math or science.

I propose that politicians, school boards teachers, administrators and parents together explore course material (which is readily available) and find the funds, the appropriate resources and the time to provide our children with a truly comprehensive education.